London Bourne 2007
Eschatology, Bitches!
August 27, 2007 - Posted by Supreme Commander at 5:16 AM
Total Kill Count: 80
Current Kill Leader: Tie: Fear Faktor Five and Agent Bozo (6)
The Day of Reckoning is upon you suckers...
During the course of the day those of you that haven't done what you were supposed to do (i.e., make 2 kills) will be like *totally* pimp-slapped out of the game.
Those of you that are part of the aforementioned pimp-slapped fools - You are poor excuses for assassins...seriously, it kinda makes me physically ill just thinking about you. I can feel the bile rise in the back of my throat with each letter I type writing about you and your non-exploits.
*spit*
Even that can't get the foul taste of your lack of skills out of my mouth...it's like a mixture of cheap booze and hooker-spit. Is it really so hard to find someone and wet them? You should be ashamed of yourselves. Entry into the world of professional assassins requires, at the minimum, dedication and low-level skills...you are obviously lacking one of the two, if not both.
Go back to the comfort of your couch...find the nice impression of your ass and nestle in it once again, eat your potato crisps and kick back and relax...you have found another part of life that you fail at.
Like your parents, I am disappointed in you.
Perhaps, next time you will be more aggressive and dedicated.
Sigh.
Despite my repugnance at your lack of wetting, it pains me to see you go, as I would have liked all of you to have experienced the thrill of the hunt. Alas, it is not to be...this time...
To those of you that made it past the this week, I offer my heartfelt congratulations. No easy feat to last this long...many have fallen to the liquid justice doled out by their fellow competitors...and more will soon fall by the hand of my personal assassins.
...and so the end begins...
Supreme Commander
Shadow Government
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