NYC 2008
kiss my ass
September 23, 2008 - Posted by Eevil Midget at 1:53 PM
I would like to quote the wise words of a mighty fine predecessor:
"You guys are shitty. That's all I have to say. See, even Londoners are coming in here taunting you. And that whole country is made up of the gays. You want the king of England coming into your house, pushing you around and having his way with your woman with his uncircumcised penis?! Fuck no. Then grab your water gun and soak that bitch. (If you get oral from a Brit, can you get gingivitis in the bathing suit area?)".
Where have all the first-rate assassins gone? The dirty sexy filthy wicked fun, the sonnaofabitch humor, the mother fucking panache, the wacky wit, if not the madcap mayhem of being crazy lunatics? Is it too much to ask? Goddaaammit. You are all worthress like Arrec Barrwin.
And all the WHINING and irritating questions about why your target is elusive. Why is everyone so fucking stupid?!
As for insinuations and accusations of shadow government incompetence... What with the political machinations and banking going tits up... hey, it's a crazy world out there. Get over it. Shit happens.
I just downed my bottle of 209 gin to cheer me up. So many losers, so little time. Ugh.
Comments
The British are Coming. All over you losers.
Hoo. HA!
Posted by: Shed Squad at September 23, 2008 3:11 PM
Muwaaahaaha. You do tickle me so MKIA.
You are so right. I only aim to please the commanders, and not deliberate pricks like you.
I do not purport to replace the great Abacus. I was merely referring to the fact that this game is probably as lame as my posts.
All relative I guess.
Posted by: eevilmidget at September 23, 2008 3:24 PM
yeah, I gotta agree. I suppose she's called eevil midget for a reason, but everytime I read her post I think, okay get your clothes on and get the fuck out of my house. Not to mention there was some good back n forth goin on the last post. Keep suckin...
Posted by: skillz at September 23, 2008 3:24 PM
the good assasins, the ones with a grasp of the enlgish language, the ones who can turn both a phrase and a woman on, the hauntingly hilarious, and the lovably disturbed with an affinity for run on sentences died when they got dq'd for saying fuck you to a dead assasin asking for their card.
apologies, IM STILL BITTER
Posted by: dead ICEMAN at September 23, 2008 3:27 PM
iceman, rules are rules.
nevertheless.
call me.
Posted by: eevilmidget at September 23, 2008 3:30 PM
shouldn't you be out killing and spending less time being (dim)witty on the blog?
Posted by: Monarch at September 23, 2008 3:35 PM
Ahhh, neutralized and triple-crossed. Not even a cigarette pushed through a bullet wound burns as much as this...
Disavowed; know that this is only the beginning. Enjoy the momentary victory, for you have only have 24 hours to live.
Are those vultures circling your office?
Posted by: Parsifal at September 23, 2008 4:30 PM
Oh yeah, before I forget...
Dear my wannabe assassin,
Your juvenile attempts to 'twist my nerves' are laughable.
You may like to think of yourself as a BLACK Mamba but you are really just a one-eyed snake...
I'd suggest you keep your eye peeled...you don't want to lose your one good one, do you?
Posted by: Parsifal at September 23, 2008 6:45 PM
This situation calls for the great words of a great man.
"I have come to kick ass and chew bubble gum and I'm all outta bubble gum".
-Rowdy Roddy Pipper
Yea so I shit my drawers on the daily, who gives a fuck. Yea, i masturbate feverishly, who gives a fuck. How many of us are left? 43? 44? 38? who gives a fuck. I know I'm here to blow your asses up like Falujah. I will be god damned if I waited over a two years to play this game to listen to a bunch of whiney bitches complain about how lame this game is.... I came to win (and chew bubble gum respectively).
The name Midnight Toker(sudden death) will proudly be displayed as this years winner** when any of your bitch asses looks this shit up on Wikipedia. I have come to rape your cattle and stampede your women.
Enough with the bitchin and up with the story telling. Taking out the Burt Dows almost killed me sexually and emotionally but i fucking made it. Big ups to Agent Hoagie, Agent Rodney Danger (pretty sure i killed you twice you slick son of a bitch) and Agent Hoagie's overweight balding brother who continuously yelled obscenities at me from his porch with a fist full of jujubees in his mouth. You dead. Much love to Team Simia who bowed before my ever threatening machismo (Mwnci, I may buy you that beer). You dead.
I swear to god if i have to deal with one more of you punk ass bitches blogging under some false name (or Agent Hoagie's juju bee lovin brother) I swear to god I will send each of you a diarrhea shit in the mail.... COD.
We have but mere days left in this mother fucker before I win. Sack up girls cause daddy's got the lube.
Praise be to Supreme and Shadow Govt
Posted by: Midnight Toker at September 23, 2008 7:30 PM
**Void where prohibited
Posted by: Midnight Toker at September 23, 2008 7:31 PM
Well fucking said.
Posted by: cupcake commando at September 23, 2008 8:01 PM
Well, I'll be there to super (soaker) curb stomp your ass midnight.... and the rest of you fucking pussies.... If some of you quit your bitching and spent even a quarter of your time hunting your targets maybe, just maybe you fuckers would have made it.... what a waste of semen you all turned out to be....
To the one I'm hunting, your ass has to come home at some point...
Posted by: ice_man1898 at September 23, 2008 8:23 PM
Post a comment
Contact your Shadow Governement Official: liveinfear@streetwars.net
When I commented on your earlier post that it is the worst game blog post ever I was wrong. I apologize for the false accusation. This latest post is without doubt the worst ever.
Please don't quote the mighty Li'l Abacus in vain before you prove your worth. So far you've shown you're worth nothing. You must give great oral though, I can't see any other reason why supreme will keep you around.
Posted by: Mr Know It All at September 23, 2008 3:11 PM